The Desk

March 31, 2012

Putting Things in Perspective

After a protracted period of looking for not just permanent but temporary or even contract work and coming up with nothing or near nothing, our spirits can be more than dampened. Fatal state of affairs.

Pouring a little sand in with the water is having your work get destroyed to the point of not being able to recover it. Mix in a little clay: you start learning that those who were trusted allies are not. Then the mixture turns into quicksand that starts pulling you and everything about you into it – you and your work are being defamed.

This state of affairs has existed for a very long time. It’s been going on for years. Add to the batter that most of the people around you are pros when it comes to seeing the dark side of a situation and complain about literally everything and you’ve got yourself a surefire way to keep yourself outside of the winner’s circle of anything.

First of all, you don’t need to add another of the negative to your recitation of what’s going on when someone asks and then comments. Simply say, “Thanks so much for your concern,” and then come up with something else to discuss. People come close to you because they are aware that you have good things to offer. When you make them uncomfortable and then turn that into the only thing on the menu, it’s like feeding them a box of dressmaker needles. It’s painful.

Next, start considering how you view things and situations in your life. Relative to you, the scene you’re having at this moment isn’t the same as the person sitting next to you nor the one two blocks away who’s going through essentially the same circumstances. They’re the same circumstances except for something very astounding – it’s them and not you and it’s all about how either of you handles it.

As an example, you can’t afford to buy groceries. So you have the presence of mind and know how to find the local food pantry. You have what’s necessary and are given enough food to last for two weeks. Most of it is the same item. You could complain. On the other hand, you can come up with new ways to prepare it so that it seems like it’s a different dish.

Additionally and even more importantly, as you’re about to put that next morsel into your mouth and consume it, you can say to yourself, “At least I have this to eat. It’s tasty, well prepared, and it nourishes me.” Face it, my friend, there is someone out there who doesn’t even have that morsel, whether it’s the same as yesterday, or earlier in the day, or at all.

Yes, it’s difficult to keep going when all you can see is your work being destroyed and no compensation for your efforts whatsoever. You feel as though you’re being devalued and maybe like you don’t have any value left. You may be feeling like you’ve been to the blood donation center and given three pints instead of one. You’re listless and have no energy. Take a few hours to rest. Then spend some time doing something that you absolutely love to do. If music gets your endorphins percolating, turn on the music. Do something to put you in the right frame of mind.

One of the best ways to attract the right attention and get back into the winner’s circle is to not add to the negative. Another way to get to the WC is to keep plugging away, in a positive manner, toward your goal. So you discovered some untrustworthy allies. There are others still there and still trustworthy. If some of them are willing, have them dance to the music with you.

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